A couple of weeks ago my psych prof Dr. Carlson mentioned, as sort of a brief post-script at the end of our section on Sigmund Freud, a guy named Wilhelm Reich. Dr. Reich was a Freudian analyst who thought that there should be a way to detect the libido energy that Freud theorized powered the human id. In the process of pursuing this goal, he discovered an omnipresent form of life energy that he named Orgone Energy which emitted blue light and seemed to have positive psychological and physiological effects. So he created a device called the Orgone Energy Accumulator that was basically a box you could sit inside of that would collect and concentrate orgone energy into your body.

Well, me being me and all, this sort of piqued my curiosity. I liked the idea of a box that would fill me with energy, and blue is such a pretty color, too! So I went off in search of more information about this Orgone stuff. I had absolutely NO idea where it was going to take me. It’s simply staggering. (If you haven’t bought your Velostat yet it’s okay, because after you read this you may find there are more imminent dangers you need to shield yourself against. Oh, and you might want to hold off on that flu shot, too.)

It turns out that orgone energy does all sorts of stuff. For instance, orgone energy is why the sky is blue. It’s what makes gravity work, and is what produces orgasms. Concentrated and directed properly using a device called a Cloud-Buster (which makes use of the principles of the Orgone Energy Accumulator), it can be used to bring rain to drought-plagued areas. I know, I know, this sounds like a pretty amazing claim, but that’s only because you haven’t yet seen this graph, in an article published by the Orgone Biophysical Research Laboratory in SW Oregon, showing the rainfall in Washington State during the month of September, 1988. As you will note, for the entire first two weeks of September, there was practically no rain whatsoever. Then, for four days beginning on Sept 13, cloudbusters were used to stimulate rain, and as you can see, it immediately began raining. “In fact,” the article says, “a pulsatory cycle of rains developed over the entire Pacific NW after these operations, and continued for several months thereafter.”

Are you getting this? RAIN. In the FALL. In THE PACIFIC NORTHWEST. For MONTHS ON END! I am so stunned that I don’t even know how to comment on this, so I will simply have to rely on each reader’s own linguistic imagination to supply him with an appropriate exclamation. Perhaps something like, “Holy Cloudbusters, Batman!”

Okay, while you’re scanning your vocabulary for an applicable comment, I have to digress from Orgon Energy for a moment, so you will be able to understand what comes later.

According to this website,

The Ionosphere is being manipulated by US government scientists using the Alaskan transmitter called HAARP, (High-Frequency Active Auroral Research Program) which sends focused radiated power to heat up sections of the Ionosphere, which bounces power down again. ELF waves produced from HAARP, when targeted on selected areas, can weather-engineer and create mood changes affecting millions of people.

The human brain is highly susceptible, it turns out, to ELF waves. And humans with special mental powers like ESP and such are even more susceptible. So ELF waves are a tool for manipulating our brains. To complement HAARP, the US military is installing GWEN towers all across the US, purportedly for use by cell phones. But what they really do is generate ELF waves, giving them the capability of mind control and “sending synthetic-telepathy as infrasound to victims with US government mind-control implants.”

This is where the flu shots come in. You know how the government urges us all to get flu shots every year, right? Well, that’s because there are these tiny implants that are injected into millions of unsuspecting Americans with vaccines and flu shots. These biochips work their way through the bloodstream and lodge in the brain, enabling the government to broadcast “voices” directly into our heads. That’s right, folks, the US Government has developed nano-technology that can successfully penetrate the blood-brain barrier. You read it here first.

And as if the picture weren’t already bleak enough already… according to the same author, the chemtrails left behind as jets travel the skies are not really streams of water vapor as we were told by our high school physics teachers, but in fact they contain chemicals which alter our state of consciousness, an effect enhanced, as it happens, by the fluoride and selenium being added to our water supply. And YOU thought it was actually to prevent tooth decay, didn’t you? See how gullible you are?

He also notes that the majority of so-called alien abductions (which I touched on in a recent post) are actually the work of the US military. They use these elaborately-staged hoaxes (using holographically-projected spaceships and other such high-tech illusions) as a decoy to distract our attention from the actual alien abductions (which do occur, but only rarely) and make it appear as if they are just the delusions of psychologically-imbalanced people, so we won’t take them seriously.

Get ready, because we have to make another digression before we get back to the original topic, which was — ummmm — what was it again?

OH, yes, Orgone Energy. Right.

But first you have to know about the “Reptilians.” These are aliens who came to Earth thousands of years ago and interbred with humans, creating a number of hybrid bloodlines. These bloodlines, down through history, have been the source of the ruling families of the European nations (now you know why they only interbreed with their own — preservation of reptilian DNA!), as well as every single one of the US presidents. Yep, you got it. Our presidents, democrats and republicans alike, have all traced their heritage back to reptilian shape-shifting aliens (who, incidentally, must consume unspecified amounts of human blood in order to maintain their human appearance).

So, let’s recap for a moment, because we’ve covered a lot of territory and I’m sure it’s a bit overwhelming to try and grasp it all at once.

The US government is putting into place a network of mind-control devices, and faking alien abductions (probably at taxpayer expense), to distract us from what’s REALLY going on, which is that the alien hybrid reptilian shape-shifters have actually been running the world all along, and are planning, at some point, to turn on all the ELF ray generators and turn us into their pawns, so that they can take over the world, which they are already in charge of. Wait. So they can… Ummm… Okay, let’s see… They’re evil and want to control our minds, but we don’t know it, because… ummm, because they’ve brainwashed us. Yeah, that’s it. No, wait… Oh, shoot. Well, never mind about all that. It’s really far too complicated for the average human to understand, so just do your best to grasp the high points, and leave the rest to those who are better able to comprehend the complex intricacies of such things. The important thing is to remember that you can’t trust the government. And don’t let anyone stick a needle in you, and don’t drink water. Or breathe. And stay away from cell phone towers. Other than that, you’re probably okay. Unless you get abducted by alians, or a stranger tries to trick you into getting into his black helicoptor, or a reptilian politician tries to drink your blood. In which case your velostat hat isn’t going to do you much good.

Anyway, now we can go back to Orgone Energy. Or, rather, its counterpart, oranur, also known as deadly orgone radiation (DOR). This stuff, as you may have gathered from its name, is bad. And, it turns out, it accumulates in places where there are ELF waves. BUT, thanks to Dr. Reich, who managed to get the word out in spite of being thrown in jail by the FDA (or was it the FBI?) and dying there (supposedly from heart failure…) and having all of his books burned (twice!), we have the power of Orgone on our side.

This is where those funds you were saving to spend on Velostat may be put to better use. Alien abductions, the real ones anyway, are actually quite rare; but there are ELF-generating towers on practically every street corner! This site contains a number of Orgone energy-based tools for neutralizing DOR. You can even purchase your very own patio-sized cloud-buster variant, the chembuster. The author of the website was sent one to try out, and writes this testimonial:

The very first day I set it up on the patio, we had a black helicopter visit us at 2 AM, hovering loudly about 150 feet overhead, and shining the brightest search light imaginable-going around and around our place- in an obvious attempt to both intimidate and video tape us inside our home using special infrared technology (which is standard equipment today, even on local police helicopters).

If this makes you reluctant to purchase your own chembuster, he notes that since there are more of them in use now, the black helicoptors tend to ignore them, so you probably don’t have to worry about having this happen to you.

The volumes of information on these topics is overwhelming; I’ve just barely skimmed the surface here, and had to whittle it down to the bare minimum due to time constraints. If you want to learn more, I suggest that you start with The Adventures of Don and Carol. I don’t think I can do these narratives justice, so I borrowed this review from the Educate-Yourself.org website:

The episodes that make up the Adventures are drawn from the daily narrative that Don had written of his experiences in this country and abroad employing and deploying his anti-parasite (two legged variety) arsenal of orgone generators (the Chembuster, Holy Handgrenades, St Buster’s Button, and the Succor Punch) and the characters he encounters along the way: some friendly, some not; some human and others, not-so-human.

Oh, and Dr. Carlson, if you’re reading this, I haven’t finished the reading for class tonight. Obviously your tantalizing distraction had a small part to play in this, so I hope you will take it into account before judging me too harshly!